Providence Bible Church

“My Story from 2009″ by Krista Zorichak (Nevaeh’s Hope)

Posted on 17. Jan, 2010 by noelle in News

Last year I began praying that my life would be glorifying to God whatever
that may be. It was clear to me that beginning that journey would be
leaving my sisters, friends, church, preteen ministry, teen mops program,
and a job in So Cal with a large salary, for… full-time ministry in Nor
Cal. I was so excited for the opportunity to use my gifts and talents in
maternity ministry and to be able to fully live my life for the glory of
God. However, I learned this year the hardest lesson in my life: sometimes
God uses pain and loss to glorify Himself. After all, in all of history God
hasn’t been more glorified than at the cross of Jesus Christ; and it
wasn’t by delivering Jesus from the cross of pain and suffering, even
though God could have.

My year began with suffering the loss of both of my grandmothers and then,
shortly after that, losing my aunt Rena after a long battle with cancer. I
also became ill with bronchitis and pneumonia during which I was told that
lung scans had located cancerous spots on my lungs that would require
radiation therapy. During this time, I found great distractions through my
job and becoming legal guardian to the most precious newborn baby I have
ever seen. Work and little Christopher became the blessings that helped to
conceal the pain. Through that time of suffering, I also learned the
valuable lesson that I couldn’t place my hope in people or in my health,
which helped me to put more of my hope in Christ.

After several months of doing the job I loved at the maternity home, I was
informed they were struggling financially and couldn’t afford to pay me.
I continued to work there several months longer until I was able to find
homes for the remaining girls, and the house was closed down. I began to
realize that my boss’s continued financial promises would also remain
unfulfilled. Through the devastation of losing my job and finances, I clung
to God as my provider and learned the lesson that I couldn’t place my
hope in money or in my job.

After thinking things could only get better, I received the worst phone
call of my life. I was informed that in two days I would have to give up
the baby who I loved as my own for 8 months and for whom I was the
guardian, to a man who signed the birth certificate despite not being the
father. As the words were being spoken through the phone, the pain was so
deep I could hardly breathe. I began sobbing and pleading with God for it
to be any other way. I loved him more than any other, and would have given
anything to not let him go. Even until the moment I handed him over, all I
could do was hope for a miracle. I envisioned a miracle as in the story of
Abraham and Isaac, with God saying, Krista, here am I, you don’t have to
place Christopher in the hands of this stranger who doesn’t even love
him; but that wasn’t how it happened. My story was to be written another
way. I would instead learn the meaning of Romans 5:3-5 – knowing that
suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and
character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s
love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been
given to us. I placed my faith in God’s love, knowing that God was
holding Christopher in His arms tighter and loving him more than I ever
could. The same love of God from which NOTHING can separate us (Romans
8:39). My friend Katherine gave me a note during this time that I treasure
and it said, “He will meet you in this trial. He will hold you, He will
sustain you, and He will comfort you. During my time of trial never have I
known God in a more real way, and never have I clung so tightly to His
promises, never has His mercy been so real and so new to me each day and so
sustaining. Never have I felt more upheld and strengthened in prayer. And
that is my prayer for you also. Praise God for His faithfulness.” At the
moment I received it, it was hard to believe it, but I now couldn’t say
it better myself.

The months to follow contained several court cases that were very
disheartening. Giving a baby over to a man who was a drug addict and
homeless only weeks before just didn’t seem to make sense. But I learned
that I couldn’t place my hope in the court system, attorneys, or even a
judge. I also learned that God is the only one who can relieve my pain.
While studying the book of Job, I was reassured God knows what He is doing
and this whole thing isn’t about me. There are painful realities in life
we cannot and will never understand. Psalm 71:20-21 “Though you have made
me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the
depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor
and comfort me once again.”

After losing Christopher, the other trials I endured in the months to
follow seemed only trivial. That was until December 17th. As I was driving
with a 15-year-old to pick up her sister from school, we were hit by a man
who ran a red light. At the time of impact, I hit my head against the
window and sustained various injuries to my lower back, including sprained
muscles, a herniated disk, and a pinched nerve. The 15-year-old was also
injured and so the weeks to follow, including the holidays, were filled
with MRI’s, physical therapy, and many hospital visits. My car was
totaled, including the brand new tires and wheel bearings I had received as
my Christmas present on the day before the accident. For weeks, I have been
in excruciating physical pain and have had to take so many pain medications
that I missed my dad’s 50th birthday party, ice skating with my family,
snowboarding with my siblings, skydiving with friends, and the memories of
the holidays with my family.

As I continue to live with this pain, I am praying for humility and love
for others, as in Philippians 2:3, that will enable me to look beyond my
own pain and see others’ hurts. I have also learned that the only
satisfying and meaningful thing in this life is my relationship with
Christ, and that is the only part that can’t be taken away.

For those of you that know me, you know I love living a fast paced life. I
love spending time outdoors doing adventurous activities. I never thought I
would say this, but a blessing from the car accident has been some of the
time I have been bed ridden. I have been able to read more books and spend
more time in God’s word than I have in years. One of those books I read
was A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller. That book has
been my inspiration in writing this story. The book is about how every life
is a story. Whether it is a story worth telling or talking about is up to
you. It shows how one man found meaning and direction…and how you can,
too. I learned from reading it that writing a story isn’t about making
your peaceful fantasies come true. The whole point of the story is the
character arc. Joy is what you feel when the conflict is over, but it’s
the conflict that changes a person. If you haven’t read the book yet, I
encourage you to do so. Another inspirational book I read was the book of
Job in the Bible. I will be honest to say that I am not yet at the point
where Job was in saying this has all been too wonderful for me, but I have
learned to find contentment and even joy outside of comfort, health, and
stability. I learned the place my hope will eternally be is in heaven and
my Savior, Comforter, and Redeemer Jesus Christ. Romans 15:13: “May the
God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the
power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” I am so thankful that
He has carried me through these trials, He has sustained me, and He has
comforted me. I can honestly say I have never known God in a more real way,
and never have clung so tightly to His promises, never has His mercy been
so real and so new to me each day, and so sustaining. Never have I felt
more upheld and strengthened in prayer. Praise God for His faithfulness!

I understand that this story isn’t about me, and it is for that reason I
share this story. I don’t write for sympathy or comfort from anyone, but
rather to encourage you in living your story.

Thank you so much to my family and friends that have been such a huge part
of this story. Your support, encouragement, and outpouring of love has been
such a huge blessing to me as well. Some of those phone calls, e-mails,
messages, hugs, visits, cards, prayers, and shoulders to cry on are what
helped me get through some of the most difficult days. Especially my
immediate family, the Arellano family, Chet and Kat Hervey, Eric and Kelly
Wheeler, Kellie and Luis Espino, Tonya and PC Walker, Ricki Loessberg,
Steve Lopez, the Dugan family, Jesse and Joanna Peterson, Lisa Reimer,
Colleen Zaremba, Holly Pacini, Kaitlin Smith, Dianna Martinez, Bethany
Brannon, Tara Kulbeth, Jenie Vega, Cheri Williams, the Dietz family, Kellie
Davenport, the Carstensen family, Omega Demaray, Heather Canlett, Heather
Shough, Bethanie Simms, Bobbiejo Pena, Zach Glenn, Janice Plonk, Heidi
Roome, Patti Zorichak, Beth Zorichak, Providence Bible Church, and
Bridgeway Christian Church. Also, thank you Donald Miller, PC Walker, and
Jesse Peterson for inspiring me to write my story.